Ryan Cassata became a known name in LGBTQ community, when in 2009, aged 15 he appeared on the Larry King show to discuss his transgender identity. Now aged 20 the singer-songwriter & motivational speaker who has successfully released seven records, performed at some of the world’s biggest Pride Festivals, and become the youngest keynote speaker for the largest transgender conference in existence, is currently starring in the documentary Songs For Alexis, screening at this year’s Queer Screen Film Festival.
Unlike the daytime chat shows that shot Ryan to fame – the documentary’s main focus isn’t on the teen’s transitioning to male. Danish director Elvira Lind instead follows the relationship between a then 18-year-old Ryan and his 16-year-old girlfriend Alexis. Alexis was first introduced to Ryan’s fans online in vlog posts where the cute couple share how they first met at a music camp.
However, their sweet relationship disintegrates through the lens of director Lind who filmed Ryan and Alexis for eight months in 2013. Through Elvira’s documentary the shine of young love fades as we see the challenges they face.
In one scene Ryan is crying hysterically and double locking doors,terrified because Alexis Dad threatened to kill him. In another scene when the couple are smoking cigarettes in a Manhattan park a homeless man tells them “If you find love, run with it, like Jane and Tarzan in the jungle.” This is what Ryan does, as the documentary sees him travelling across America, writing love songs in a quest to hold onto his first love.
Talking to Film Festival Guide, Ryan describes the filming process of this emotionally charged documentary and discusses the challenges the trans community face today.
–Logistically how did the eight month filming process work?
Elvira traveled back and forth from Manhattan most times (sometimes from Denmark). Sometimes she did stay with our family. We had a special room set up for her. There wasn’t ever a time where we couldn’t trust Elvira. She meshed in with our family so well. We didn’t even realise there was a camera. We’d eat dinner together a lot of nights. She became part of the family.
–What did you learn about yourself and your family from watching the documentary?
Well, to me it’s all really the same. We are portrayed in the documentary exactly as we were two years ago when we filmed it. We are all a little older now and possibly more mature.
–You are an inspiration not only to the trans community, but to all people who are trying to become what they were meant to be in whatever realm that is, who were your inspirations when you were growing up and who are your inspirations now?
Thank you. Growing up I really worshiped rock n’ roll superstars (ex: The Doors, Led Zeppelin, Guns N’ Roses, T. Rex). I fell madly in love with classic rock and from that I became driven to do music professionally and as much as I possible could. In High School I really idolised Harvey Milk after hearing he graduated from my school and about all the positive change he made from San Francisco that changed the entire world.
–How has the trans community evolved since you were young?
Things are progressing. We are marching on in the right direction. We are getting closer and closer to equality. We still haven’t caught up to our gay brothers and sisters (and everyone in between), but we will in time if we keep fighting for what is right.
–In the documentary you said you were living your dream, is that still the case?
Definitely, I love what I do.
–Would you ever have a long distance relationship again?
Well, any relationships that I will have will be long distance when I go on tour. I hope to tour even more at one point, maybe 6 months out of the year in the future. When that happens, if I’m in a relationship, I will definitely be in a long distance relationship. It’s not easy with the distance but it is possible.
–Will you be performing any concerts in Sydney?
Unfortunately, I can’t make it out to the film festival. I would have LOVED too. Hopefully I will make it to Australia one day in the future!
–What advice would you give to people who feel they have been born in the wrong body?
Do what you feel is most comfortable for you. Transition the way you want to, not for society. Come out only when you are ready to come out. Be you. Always, always, be you. Sometimes things don’t get better but they do get easier to deal with when you learn the right tools.
–What advice would you give to someone going through a heartbreaking breakup?
Breakups are the worst. Eat tons of mac n’ cheese, watch Netflix, and when you are ready, go back out there and find another lover. Someone is out there for you.
Songs for Alexis screens Saturday 20 Sept at the Queer Screen Film Festival.
15 years and above.
